Tag Archives: life

Role-playing – Blog No. 19

Dice and Poker Chips on Game TableConsider yourself a player.   A life-player.  You are one.  You cannot think that life is not a game.  It is an elaborate game of chance.  How exciting is the notion that you can change totally the direction of your everyday by doing one small thing differently?  That is some clout.  Like touching the steering wheel at 220km/h on the autobahn.  The smallest nudge has big implications.  How comfortable are we accepting that we are all role-players?  I think a great many people are either in denial, or are unable to reconcile their own manipulation with themselves.  We are all manipulators.  Every single one of us.  How skilled we are at manipulating is testimony to the teachers we had as children.  We learned from watching our parents manipulate each other.  We learned from being manipulated.  Even as a child you know when you are being manipulated.  It is impossible not to feel coercion.  You can hide from it, or hide it from yourself, but in every exchange you have with another there is some form of manipulation underway.  It’s about wants and needs.  We all want our needs met.  How closely do we pay attention to the needs of others?  Perhaps not closely enough.  But we are all built from the same basic stuff.  In that way we start life equal.  We are all of an egg, a sperm.  But we are equal only at the point before fertilization.  After fertilization it becomes clear how successful our genetic coding is – because we are not genetically equal by any stretch of the imagination.  It depends how far our parents’ bodies had evolved by the time we were conceived.  It depends how good the best of each parent actually was at the time of conception.  We have unique patterns of personality, as individual as our experience of the world.  We are not the same, but we are one.  We are part of the diversity, our thoughts are part of the far-reaching collective unconscious to which we all have access.  We are alone in our perception of the world and alone in our expression thereof, but in each of us is the same driving nature, we all face the same need to self-actualise.  How much time do you spend ruminating on life with the great masters?  You should meet them in your head.  One by one.  They all live there.  You have to learn how to speak each one’s language.  In fact you cannot appreciate your own mother-tongue until you learn another language.  Each language houses a different reality.  We need to share our learning and celebrate our diversity.  We need to take on the roles we create for ourselves and play them to the best of our ability.  There is no coincidence in your being where you find yourself.  You have carved for yourself the niche in which you find yourself confined.  If you are confined, you need to free yourself.  Or you need to be free of yourself.  The self is a great oppressor.  It, too, is an efficient manipulator.  But celebrate that.  It is your choice to benefit from your own experience.  It is your choice to learn who you are and to make yourself stand out by virtue of your understanding of life’s lessons.  You were made to do something.  Find out what it is by seeing where you have sent yourself.

You will find that some of you are more refined than others.  Some of you understand life better.  It depends how emotionally intelligent you are.  You need to foster emotional intelligence.  You bring it up in you, like a child.  You cannot play the life game until you tend to your inner child.  It holds the dice.  You know how powerful the drive of the subconscious when the inner child is in control?  It is something to behold.  That is always something to think about before you switch to auto-pilot.  Let your subconscious speak, but perhaps do not let it act for you.  You can never guarantee the way an encounter with the ego will go.

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You, we, and I – Blog No. 14

selflessnessTake the time to sit with yourself and ask yourself how attached you are to yourself.  If it were required of you to let go of yourself – your entire being as you today know it – how hard would you find that to do?  Perhaps for some that kind of non-attachment comes easily.  It depends on your upbringing (a lot depends on your upbringing, incidentally) and it depends on your life view.  For some the need to hold tight to the self will be intense, the fear of forsaking, abandoning – all the emotive words – leaving, oneself to one’s own devices too huge to contemplate.  I happen to think that until we let go of every single one of our preconceived notions about ourselves we will be trapped on the hamster-wheel of life.  We will be bound to our own fates.  In order to gain control, we need to lose control.  We need to let go.  It takes some bravery to step inside one’s own mind and do a stock-take.  The longer you leave it, the more daunting the task.  Best to visit with yourself often when you are young, and you are never going to be as young as today.  Ironically, it is only by stepping inside of one’s mind that one can find the objectivity needed to separate yourself from the destiny you have prescribed for yourself.  It takes some doing, too, to take your own destiny on, and change it.  Destiny can be pretty set in its ways, like a deep-sleeping dragon.  The thing to understand is that each small change you make will have an immediate effect on your future.  Immediate.  That is how powerful our hold over ourselves is.  The bigger picture changes slowly, that is the way of things in this world.  But it starts to change from the moment you make that first change.  Choose to have an effect on your future because it will happen for you, regardless.  Better to be in control – on some level – of where it is that you are going and what it is that you are doing.  We do not reserve the right to control everything that happens to us in this life-space.  Life as an everyday is too unpredictable to find ourselves ever getting complacent.  Surely?

The problem is, we do get complacent as human beings.  We become caught in the rut of routine (which speeds time up, incidentally – so break with routine for a slower life) and we follow our peculiar habits as humans, as attached to those as we are to the notion of ourselves.  It makes a lot of sense to separate willingly with your own tradition.  It teaches you something new about the self you are letting go of, every time.

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