Tag Archives: self

06 Jul 2015 · 09:32

Bleeding – Blog No. 34

Bleedingout

Bleeding is all very well.  It has been practiced for centuries.  It has traditionally been seen as a kind of purging, a ridding the body of contamination.  Contamination is a big word.  It should not be thrown around without respect for the fact that without the de-contaminant the contamination will spread like wildfire.  That is the way with disease.  In an equation that looks the way that does, I would suggest that the best place to find yourself is inside the de-contaminant.  A contamination is a negative.  A de-contamination is a positive – and positives give you wings.  Negatives tend to get you nowhere.

Bleeding is not the only way to find out that you – and others – are alive.  There are quite a few alternatives.  Now and again I choose search and salvage over destroy and discard.  It yields the most remarkable truths – perhaps truths that are truer than those extracted using force or manipulation.  This exercise in restraint takes extraordinary self-control.  If you should be in any doubt about that you are wrong.  Should you try your true self on or take your reality to task, you will then understand the reason(s) for your being and the need for total exposure when it comes to yourself and the speaking of your truth.

Truth – in part – is our life-blood.  Denial of the truth is like a clotted artery.  A cluttered socket.  Before truth can bleed out – which at this pace will take a million tomorrows – the clots need removing and a wound needs opening.  Once the clots have been removed and the truth has bled out, the coagulant will step in and seal the wound.  I was once told that open wounds tell love stories to the sky.  I believed it, not because I am naïve or gullible – but because it is true.  It always was.

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17 Feb 2014 · 12:52

Faith – Blog No. 9

faithThe bottom line is that it does not matter what you have faith in, as long as you do have faith in something.  Perhaps in these fractured times the only thing you feel comfortable having faith in, is yourself.  If that is the case, know that that is enough.  When you believe in what you can do – in your individual capacity, and as part of a collective – you harness a power that will surprise you with where it can take you, and others.  Should you wish to believe in a power higher than yourself (which is all relative, for what you find in yourself is what has existed for centuries in all of the gods, God, Allah, Dreamtime, Nature, etc, feel justified in doing so.  You are a reflection of what you find admirable in your chosen deity/deities.)  You can believe in more than one deity, if you so choose.  All the ‘good’ characteristics that you try to adopt, emulate, exist inside of you already so it matters not which ‘good’ you ultimately choose to follow, it is all the same thing, really.  That should be a comforting thought.

Faith means dedication.  It means understanding and application.  Simply believing in something and trusting its say-so is not enough, you need to do something with your faith.  Make it work for you.  That is what it is for.  Faith is not there to subjugate you, to cripple your progress, so if what you choose to believe in makes you lesser rather than greater as a human being, then perhaps you need to shuffle your belief systems a little, or change your faith.

Faith is a symbol of hope.  It keeps you striving for better, going forwards.  Faith should have no boundaries, no restrictions.  Nor should a person’s faith receive criticism or judgement from another person.  You should be able to open wide to the understanding that placing your implicit trust in something is not a weakness.  It is a strength.  For one reason or another, humans go far further in life when they believe they are supported somehow, by something, in this world.  Perhaps what you believe in is not ‘of’ this world, technically, but faith means you know it is out there and it makes a difference to your everyday, the knowing.  Faith has extraordinary power, and this power – when properly directed – can change an entire existence.

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28 Oct 2013 · 10:23

Timing – Blog No. 83

just-a-pinch-buddah-perfect-timingTiming is everything in life.  Just think, you cannot force a rose to bloom.  You cannot hurry up a caterpillar with its business of changing into a butterfly.  You stand back, and you watch.  When the time is right these things happen.  They know when.  If you are a wise person, you will appreciate every stage of the changing.  You will allow things to become what they must, in their own good time and you will marvel – with hindsight – at the process.  Hindsight is a tool.  Use it.  It is helpful when you want to get a feel for how far you have come.

Timing is vital.  If you jump at the wrong moment, for instance, you will land badly.  If you are going to leap, you must time your leap perfectly.  The only way to do that is to trust instinct implicitly when it comes to you, insisting.  Instinct will have all its reasons lined up and ready for inspection should you be able to stay quiet for long enough for them to make themselves heard.  You have to listen carefully to its justifications, instinct can explain your very purpose on the planet.

You are not where you are in time, by accident.  Your timing is your responsibility.  Use it to perfect yourself to benefit mankind.  Keep in mind that your version of a perfect self is whatever perfect means to you.  Perfect is being in a place where you like yourself, your contribution to the world.  If you are not in that place then you must ask yourself why.  There are always reasons why, you must just feel like hearing them.  If you can do something that no one else can do, do it so that others can see.  We can all benefit from that kind of sharing.  If you do not yet know what you are capable of, then learn.  There is always time for that.

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20 Aug 2013 · 08:43

Vanity – Blog No. 65

mirror-mirror-on-the-wall2You are not vain if you take care of your appearance.  You are not vain if you are self-conscious about how you look to the world and you spend time on presenting your best.  Just do not get caught in the trap of thinking you are the reason this earth revolves.  If you should imagine that the sun shines out of your backside, please reassess yourself.  That would be vanity.  When you follow the thinking that you are in some way superior to another person because of how you look, you are misguided.

Vanity is not an attractive quality.  It negatively affects the nature of a person, you lose your sense of self when you become vain.  People who buy into their own hype in life, are vain.  I do not understand how anyone can buy into their own hype.  How can you fall for your own tricks?  These society people who are in love with themselves are falling for the oldest trick in the book.  When you are mesmerised by your own reflection in this world, you are closed to possibility.  Worshipping yourself is not advisable if you have any plans of going anywhere worthwhile or having a lasting impact on this planet.  People tire easily of those who love to blow their own trumpets.  The noise they make destroys the peace of transformation going on all around us.  When you are stuck staring at how great you are you forget that you are here to serve humanity.  The planet needs more people who are prepared to put down their mirrors and see for real.

It is easy to check where you are in life with vanity – you need to ask yourself why you are loved.  That is always a very interesting question to ask of yourself, and of the people who love you.  It is not always easy to spell out the reasons one has love for another, but it is worth checking with a partner why they think they ‘love’ you.  When you hear why, you will understand how your partner sees Love.  You should always consider important how your partner views Love.  It may not be the same way you look at it.  Love should be able to speak clearly for itself.  If someone loves you and they are too shy to tell you why, that is sweet.  Perhaps treasure that innocence.  If a person can show you why they love you, even better.  Showing is usually far better than telling.

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27 May 2013 · 08:20

Awareness – Blog No. 42

Johari-Window-Model_JK-Web_RevisedStart by asking yourself how much you know about this planet you inhabit.  Its people.  Its animals.  Its problems.  How much do you know about yourself?  It is easy to assume that you know everything there is to know about who you are, since you are the one who has lived with you since birth, but in each of us there remains the unknown.  There are aspects of ourselves that lie dormant, waiting patiently for the push it will take to wake them up.  That push comes from facing adversity.  From loving with everything you have.  From procreating.  From creating.  We are all creators.  Take pleasure – and pride – in your creation:  your life.  If you cannot feel pride about your life then you understand you are on the wrong path, wasting your potential.  If you cannot feel positive about your days and the place you find yourself in them, then you realise you need to adjust your thinking.  You cannot avoid having to modify your thoughts when you want to take yourself out of a mediocre situation.  There is not one of us who should accept mediocrity.  If your life is mediocre, fix it.  It has the potential for excellence.  You should want to find the best in yourself.  If you do not feel that need, you should perhaps question your purpose on this planet.  If you cannot define your purpose, you need to find one.  You cannot go from dawn until dusk each day without true purpose.

Others are helpful when it comes to making us aware.  Be willing to take another’s opinion on board, sometimes it will be your saving grace.  If a person is brave enough to tell you what you don’t want to hear, respect their courage and do your best to impact the assessment.  If you do not trust the person who is giving you their opinion, then do not bother taking their words to heart.  Use them as exercise, emotional exercise.  It is easy.  You will know if someone is criticising you, or giving you feedback.  You cannot mistake the feeling of being criticised.  Be grateful for feedback when it is objective, honest.  Do not accept insults, accept the truth.

In your awareness, make space for further awareness.  Expand your capacity.  Know that your mind is eager to stretch itself to accommodate the new.  Be curious about who you are in relation to other people.  We are not all the same, but we are a collective.  Your differences are your distinction.  Similarities are sweet, comfortable, routine.  They make us feel safe.  A difference makes a difference.  Find your best in your distinction.  You will not find your best when you sit in the ditch with the rest of humanity whining about the world owing you a living.  The world owes you nothing.  You owe you.  It is important to realise that giving in this world is what is required right now.  Giving is vital for a person’s well-being.  Until every single person on this planet is in a position to give (something back), we have a problem – an imbalance.  When you give nothing, you get nothing.  When you have nothing, you cannot give.  It’s a vicious circle.

The thing to know is that the world does not pick up man’s mess.  The world moves along at a pace unchanged.  Time ticks as fast as it always did, we only have twenty-four hours in each day.  Make sure you use your hours for the betterment of yourself, of others.  Be aware of your wants, your needs.  Be aware of what you say, to whom.  What you have to say for yourself, tells.

 

 

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10 May 2013 · 09:22

Instinct – Blog No. 37

instinctInstinct is not your sixth sense.  Your sixth sense is extra-sensory perception.  Instinct is there to be heeded.  It is not a fleeting feeling that you cannot pin down, it is a concrete feeling that you cannot pretend you do not have.  We all have strong instincts.  A lot of us are just good at suppressing them.  We teach ourselves to ignore our instincts, too.  This is not productive.  Instincts are powerful enough to make us act when we let them.  When you have to trust your instincts – and we all rely on their being there when we need them – you find yourself acting quickly, decisively.  Your instincts steer you towards the ‘safest’ option for your human in a given situation.  A driving instinct is our desire to survive.  Most of us operate on auto-pilot in this regard.

I think some days how fragile our existence, really.  We need air to breathe, otherwise we die.  Simple.  We need trees to produce oxygen.  Why are we letting deforestation go ahead?  Why are we allowing certain nations to decimate their jungles?  There should be someone who can say no to these things and have people listen for a change – someone who has the ears of a collection of civilised leaders.  The jungles do not belong to the people.  They belong to the earth.  She should be considered in all of this.  Like the animals should be considered in all of this.

How much longer are the humans going to waste going in the direction of money?  Money is helpful but it must be kept in perspective.  It does good when it’s used properly, but it also makes palm oil plantations grow.  It makes logging a viable option for a lot of people.  It makes dogs fight, cocks fight.  It makes circuses trap animals and it kills rhinos, whales.  Money makes sex into big business.  How do we slow down a people obsessed with its power?  Money in this world is a god.  It is worshipped as such.  How can it be in a world this rich that the global economy is failing?  There is too much about this man looking out for himself only, and that man taking more than his fair share.  When you have this imbalance you have a problem.  You do not have to give the shirt off your back to the next homeless guy you see.  That is not what charity is about.  Just be aware that as a person taking up space on this planet you are obliged to give something back.  Every single human has that duty.  There are currently too many takers, not enough givers.  And you cannot say you have nothing to give.  You give of yourself if you cannot give materially.

 

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25 Feb 2013 · 12:25

Respecting – Blog No. 18

War_child-viIn some cultures, respect is an intrinsic part of an everyday.  It permeates every action, word, deed.  Other cultures cannot spell the word.  I think this imbalance is having a major impact on the stability of our world.  Respect is taught to children.  It is taught, it is not inherited.  As is accountability.  You show respect in order to teach respect.  Particularly to children.  Are you aware that by the age of three a child has developed a significant part of its moral make-up?  It learns from what it sees.  By three, a child’s values are established and it has garnered important life skills that will assist or hinder it on its journey to adulthood.  That means children are to be treated with care.  Some cultures currently do not understand this.  Try to remember that the world you promote to a child is the world they will believe exists.  It is not easy to change early impressions.

Every child that is abused or exploited is a child destroyed.  Every childhood destroyed, is sacrilege.  The value of the purity contained in the true experience of growing up should not be overlooked.  The value of proper nurturing by parents should not be overlooked, either.  The true experience for a child is about preserving the innocence for as long as you can.  Importantly, preserving innocence is never about lying to a child.  It is about protecting a child from the adult content of our world.

It is a serious failing that we have as many broken children on this planet as we do.  Too many children have seen too much, too soon.  For the particular crime of child abuse (emotional, physical, circumstantial or spiritual) – for it is a crime against Nature to damage a child – there is no absolution.  Your karma and your end of days will teach you just how frowned upon cruelty to children is.  Remember that in our time a childhood is short.  That is how it is.  Life moves quickly for us all.  I see a problem in that there are no halcyon days for a great many children in this world of ours.  In a world as adept as this we should not allow our governments to sidestep this issue.  They must allocate more funding to social services.  They must train more social workers and pay them properly to do the jobs that can make a difference to a child’s life.  The world needs more volunteers who wish to heal hurt children.  The warring nations of this world need to take accountability for destroying their own children with their pointless vendettas and stop blaming peacemakers for their lost youth.  To teach hatred to a child is child abuse.  Israel should think about that.  Hamas should think about that.  Syria should take note and Osama bin Laden’s lost followers should stop brainwashing themselves and martyring innocents.

I think the global community must be more concerned about what is going on in its front garden.  A childhood can never be reclaimed.  As such, each one should be treasured by the adults – us – for the sake of the small person who is learning its way in our big world and for the sake of the adult that that child will become.  It is simple.  If respect is not shown for you, for your innocence as a child, you will find it difficult as an adult to reconcile respect for yourself with an everyday.  You will learn how to disrespect your inner child as an adult and this has dire consequences.

Assess yourself.  Recognise that the wounded child in you demands respect.  And yes, we all have one.  If you missed a childhood or were not taught respect when you were younger then teach yourselves what it is now.  Do this by watching others respect you.  If others do not respect you, it is because they have seen no reason to do so.  That is often hard to accept.  If you care, accept it and give them reason.  If you do not care, you are on the wrong planet.  You will feel better for some respect.  Perhaps it is most important to remember that it is necessary to nurture respect in yourself and others because it is fundamental to love.  And without love, we cannot fix the broken children, or adults, in this world.  The responsibility is ours.

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22 Feb 2013 · 12:13

Love understands – Blog No. 17

neon-love-sign-3Where do you go when you have no answers for your questions?  You go inside.  Deeper inside.  When you think you have no further resources, open to yourself.  That sounds easier than it is, perhaps, but it is only at the point where you feel yourself facing a brick wall that you will come to realise that you have a way to go yet.  With every fibre in your being you will realise that your challenge is only beginning.  That is no reason to get dispirited.  Emotional brick walls are daunting to meet and tricky to bypass.  Over the obstacle is always possible, but the problem is you leave it behind, unattended.  Under the obstacle – not advisable.  You should not like to find yourself crushed by the weight of it.  Around the obstacle is an option, but that takes too long.  And besides, going around it you give yourself a lot of work as well as an extra choice – left or right – which is a bit like meeting the Sphinx at the crossroads and wanting to go straight.  I should add that going straight is the best way.  It is the hardest, but it yields the best results.  Plough through the questions posed by your inner Sphinx and go through the wall.  Some walls you will pass through easily.  Some you will not.  Some you will bang your head against, time and again.  They say that it is insanity to do the same thing over and over, expecting different results.  It is only insanity if you do not ultimately achieve your end goal.  That might take you seventeen attempts, it might take you two, but you can rest assured that if you work from your heart and you keep trying, you will succeed at what it is you need to succeed at.  That we will find what we are seeking is an indisputable law of Nature.  Do not be tempted to give up – on yourself – when you find yourself hitting your head against a wall.  You have to brace your mind, put your head down, and try again.  The wall will eventually give way to your persuasion.  It always does.  You have to be sure you are approaching it right, that’s all.

Understand that there is a love to which we all owe our allegiance.  The love within.  It’s source is bigger than every single one of us on this planet, and it is enormous when all of us are put together.  Love begets love.  It seems such a tired concept, such an over-used ideal.  But it’s there.  That love is constant.  It is what keeps us alive.  Do not take your love for granted.  Recognise it.  And if you cannot see it – then search harder.  Everyone has access to love.  Everyone.  And everything, has beauty.  Choose to see it.

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12 Feb 2013 · 14:50

You, we, and I – Blog No. 14

selflessnessTake the time to sit with yourself and ask yourself how attached you are to yourself.  If it were required of you to let go of yourself – your entire being as you today know it – how hard would you find that to do?  Perhaps for some that kind of non-attachment comes easily.  It depends on your upbringing (a lot depends on your upbringing, incidentally) and it depends on your life view.  For some the need to hold tight to the self will be intense, the fear of forsaking, abandoning – all the emotive words – leaving, oneself to one’s own devices too huge to contemplate.  I happen to think that until we let go of every single one of our preconceived notions about ourselves we will be trapped on the hamster-wheel of life.  We will be bound to our own fates.  In order to gain control, we need to lose control.  We need to let go.  It takes some bravery to step inside one’s own mind and do a stock-take.  The longer you leave it, the more daunting the task.  Best to visit with yourself often when you are young, and you are never going to be as young as today.  Ironically, it is only by stepping inside of one’s mind that one can find the objectivity needed to separate yourself from the destiny you have prescribed for yourself.  It takes some doing, too, to take your own destiny on, and change it.  Destiny can be pretty set in its ways, like a deep-sleeping dragon.  The thing to understand is that each small change you make will have an immediate effect on your future.  Immediate.  That is how powerful our hold over ourselves is.  The bigger picture changes slowly, that is the way of things in this world.  But it starts to change from the moment you make that first change.  Choose to have an effect on your future because it will happen for you, regardless.  Better to be in control – on some level – of where it is that you are going and what it is that you are doing.  We do not reserve the right to control everything that happens to us in this life-space.  Life as an everyday is too unpredictable to find ourselves ever getting complacent.  Surely?

The problem is, we do get complacent as human beings.  We become caught in the rut of routine (which speeds time up, incidentally – so break with routine for a slower life) and we follow our peculiar habits as humans, as attached to those as we are to the notion of ourselves.  It makes a lot of sense to separate willingly with your own tradition.  It teaches you something new about the self you are letting go of, every time.

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21 Jan 2013 · 09:42

The Road to Utopia – Blog No. 8

68637_524425970922339_1527996228_nThe road to Utopia is not an easy road. You need smarts, wits, tenacity and a very good vehicle. It would be good if you could read from the stars, the sun. It would be advantageous if you had your own vision of perfection and were keen to strive towards it. You are advised to wear a seatbelt and to expect the unexpected. If you are not good at expecting the unexpected, then practice. Give yourself surprises until you get used to embracing the unknown. Do something new. It’s the only way forward. In this age of über-speed we need to know how to move smoothly with the chaos of an everyday. Do you realise how much information you are processing every minute? What are you absorbing, what are you hearing and adhering to? What you need to realise is that each moment of each day you are moulding your future with the choices you make based on what you respond to. That is how much control you have over your destiny. It is all in your hands. Unfortunately, a lot of people are dropping the ball.

The road to Utopia is worth finding. It’s worth travelling. More importantly, it’s there. That Yellow Brick Road that Elton John said goodbye to, is there. That is something to inspire hope in all but the totally hopeless. And worringly, there are those. A great many of those. We find people of every sort on our path to perfection and I can attest to the fact that it is in your acceptance of each kind of person you come across that you will find your own freedom. We all have something in common. Ourselves. Who cares what colour your skin is, really. Do you think a black family feels any different to a white family when their child is stolen from them? Their sense of loss will be the same. Will the 40 000+ children the LRA has stolen be forgotten by any single one of those parents? They will not. Is £30 million raised each time a black child is kidnapped and turned into a child-soldier? No. They are left to their own devices, those bereft families. When will the people realise that the theft of those children’s souls feeds the evil of Joseph Kony’s regime? I have to wonder how one black man can ‘disappear’ like he does. Do not tell me that nobody on this planet knows where Joseph Kony is hiding. Somebody knows. They must just be motivated to say so. What would motivate a man who has already sold his own soul? Think about it. Does an Indian man’s heart break any differently to that of a Welshman? I don’t believe so. I believe we are all subconsciously striving to be our best – whatever that best is. Even the cartel works to its best – with a kind of precision that is almost as flawless as the German language. When we start to understand the rituals and behaviours of our fellow men (incidentally, I am not a feminist) we will be more likely to succeed at making this planet less of a contemporary nightmare for millions of people. And that should be our collective goal. Any human being with one iota of conscience would want a more equal world for a lot of people. Freedom is everyone’s dream, I feel. Can you imagine how precious that ideal must be to someone who has never experienced freedom? And sadly, there are those. Our world needs to right a few wrongs, accept a few anomalies, make its peace with the past and get progressive.

Have a conscience. Feel how it is to be someone with internet, someone with a hot bath, someone with food in your fridge. You don’t have to suffer for your privileges, just realise them. I find it hard showering and thinking of all the starving mouths of thirsty Somalian babies. I can afford to let pure clean water run while I brush my teeth because the country I live in has a surplus. Also, I can afford to pay for that which I waste. It’s crazy. It’s also frustrating. How many countries have surplus crops that could be sent to where they are needed if there was no bureaucracy or corrupted politics getting in the way? How much money given to charities goes to the cause you think you are supporting?

Living in this world of contrasts takes a lot of thinking. Or it should. Living right means seeing beyond your comfort zone to a place where you are facing yourself in a new frame. Who is it that you are? What do you care about? What do you need? What do you want? Ask yourself. The answers are always interesting.

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