Sex is not a word that should make you shy or fearful in this day and age. If it makes you fearful, then you have issues that need dealing with professionally. If your sex is damaged in any way you need to address the subject with a person who is trained to tell you how to deal with the trauma and help you assimilate your experience(s). If you are an adult shy around sex it means that you are immature in your understanding of its power. If it makes you giggle and blush then you are probably Catholic. Catholics and sex have a long history of conflict. Puritans, too. These religious institutions understand the power of sex and as such, will try to control it. Theirs’ is a delusion. The church cannot control the sex of a population. That part of them belongs firmly to Nature. How you choose to express your sexuality is your business. There should not be anyone overly interested in your sexual persuasion unless you are a paedophile or a rapist, in which case you should be named, shamed, and then castrated. A paedophile should not be allowed anywhere near children. If you make the mistake of abusing a child even once – you should never be given a person’s faith again. Ever. For the rest – the normal human beings out there – you are what you are, and you are who you are. No matter who or what you are, understand that sex is a sacred act. It should be. Who you choose as a partner is of consequence and what you do to and with their body is of consequence.
Sex is both give and take. It is a learning. It is not something you are born good at, it is something you get good at. If you can be bothered. In our contemporary society there is so much taking going on that the scales are seriously off balance. People do not take time enough to learn each other well. Men take sex from a lot of women – who offer it willingly to just about anyone who will show them attention. This coupling is neither romantic, nor does it have anything to do with love. It is an exchange of fluids and a flood of oxytocin. Oxytocin is a very powerful hormone. A lot of people are addicted to its effect. This means a lot of people neither care nor worry about where they pull a partner from. A lot of women are looking for princes and a lot of men know how easy it is to flatter the pants off a wannabe princess. Wannabe princesses abound in our society. I hope the men of the future are equipped to deal with the fall-out.
Excellent sex is about love. Love is about soul. It is about a true connection. Pornography is not helpful as a starting block – there are too many people in our world with bent expectations of sex. Hard-core porn and child-porn are particularly problematic – the trade in transgression is out of control. It is not easy to correct a mindset aligned with transgression. How do you stop a world, literally, from screwing itself up further? You remind the people that sex is personal expression. Be careful who you show what. Have some respect. Your demonstration speaks for you in more ways than one. Should you wish to waste your sex on random strangers then know that you are damaging yourself. Worse – you are using people. If you use people you will be used. Your sex will become empty and you will not be fulfilled. To be unfulfilled is not something to aspire to. Too many people use sex as a pain-killer in this fractured society. This is wrong sex. Right sex is a sharing. And do not ever confuse physical intimacy with love. They are not the same thing. If you allow someone to take your body and use it for their own gratification – no matter what fairytales are singing in your ears – you are responsible for the damage done to your psyche. You cannot escape your psyche – ever. Keep it clean.