What is your temperament? Do you like who it is that you are? If you should like yourself some of the time, that is a start. If you like who you are a great deal – yours is the right space. You cannot like yourself when you behave badly, try as you might. Your knowing, your moral fortitude will not allow you to. If you have no moral compass, it must be said that no one can help you. A moral compass (or the lack of one) is inherent. Remember, too, that it is your choice how you behave – not another’s. Another’s bad behaviour towards you is not permission for you to act like an arsehole. Try not to let yourself drop your standards – or your guard – in the name of petty retaliation. Choose your reactions; ensure that they suit the occasion.
You can lie to your heart’s content, you can make excuses for yourself and your short-comings, you can find reasons to justify your bad behaviour. All of this is possible – and very do-able. We all do it and we are all good at it. Have you heard how adept you are at justifying your actions so that you can feel less responsible for bad behaviour? It is natural to try and allocate blame somewhere – or delegate it – the need is almost instinctive. It takes a dedicated human being to treat blame as your own bedfellow. How often do you sit with yourself and accept responsibility for your strained relations with others, your rudeness, your intolerance? How often will you apologise for your misdemeanours? And I am talking about apologising to yourself, as well as to others.
Your temperament is not only your nature. It is not just your personality. It is your whole, your calling card in this world. It is the reason people will find you attractive, or not. It is why you will be successful, or not. If you have a shit temperament, do something about it. Your reactions are within your power. Each of them. If you do not like how you behave in certain situations – either avoid putting yourself in those situations or transform the way you feel about what is happening to you. You change your viewpoint – particularly when it comes to the how and why of your behaviour(s) – and you change the way you are perceived in this world. That can make all the difference.