Tag Archives: parents

Let’s clarify something about Love – Blog No. 7

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I think there is some confusion when it comes to the term:  in Love.  For instance, you can have a deep Love for your family members but it is not appropriate to be ‘in Love’ with them.  That then bends Love’s trajectory towards incestuous and incest is not fine no matter what planet you are on.  The point is, though, it is not okay to hide that kind of shit if it exists and is an issue.  The point is to treat the cause of the problem, not the symptoms.  Ask why a father would impregnate his daughter, why he would find her sexually attractive in the first place?  Why would a possessive mother seduce her son?  I mean that sort of sexual attraction is alarming to me and it really does need addressing.  Basically – incest kills true intimacy.  It breaks sacred bonds.  That confuses children and it causes inexplicable pain that dominoes down the generations.  Therefore – incest is not acceptable and that is not a negotiable point if the healthy concept of family is to survive its deconstruction.

If you are the parents of a child, or children, it makes sense to remember that you chose each other with whom to ‘breed’, as such.  Surely you choose to have a baby with someone you are in Love with?  If you didn’t, then I question why you are parents.  Children are not a ‘by-product’ of sex – make sure you get that straight.  They are a choice.  If you do not make the choice, then do not have kids.  It’s simple, really.  Children who watch their mothers and fathers hate each other for a living learn nothing about Love, about choices.  They learn hate and blame, about bondage and obligation.  They are also torn, often, between taking sides with their mother or their father and that is not the sort of choice a child should ever have to make.  I suspect that there are a great many bullies in relationships – male and female – who enjoy the convenience of a resident punch-bag, as such.  That may be how things are for a lot of people, but it is important to understand that that kind of ‘relationship’ is not of Love – not in ANY shape or form.

In Love.  Again – it may be helpful to understand that ‘in Love’ is not a destination.  It is a privilege:  the beginning of a journey into the heart of what really matters.  Love is not a commodity, despite what some humans might think.  What some humans think matters not, however, and Love knows that.  It is when Love falls in Love that it is liable to lose its own control.  Maybe that is no bad thing.  Perhaps ‘out of control’ Love is exactly what this wounded planet needs?

 

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Childhood – Blog No. 56

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Childhood is for children. That means it is a time of innocence. Every child has innocence. Should you be responsible for taking the innocent wonder out of the life-experience of a child, you will have a lot to answer for when that child becomes an adult. It is not easy to ensure that a childhood is untainted in this day and age, but it is possible.

Childhood is short for most children these days, that is why it is important to cherish the idea of it. Again I will say it, if you cannot offer a child a happy childhood, why have one? That kind of a betrayal is sacrilege. Children are all born with hope. Love, and innocence too. If you choose to damage these faculties in a child, you can safely consider yourself a cruel person.

There are those parents that will live vicariously through their children, and this, too, tampers with the early experience that children should be having. Children need guidance, they do not need their parents to make their choices for them. Childhood is a time for exploration, for children to learn how to make sense of the world they have been born into. An adult is not able to make up a child’s mind.

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Breeding – Blog No. 86

IVF donation tinsWhy do people who can barely provide for themselves, breed?  Why are millions of children caught up in their parent’s poverty?  When you bring a child into a shit life – and you know very well whether your life is shit or not – what are you thinking?  I don’t think you are thinking.  You can’t be.  In some countries children are bred to sell, or to work.  That makes no sense.  The parents must work.  For themselves, first.  If you cannot put food on the table for yourself, let alone a family, then you have to sit parenthood out.  You do not breed children to provide for you – know that for free.  It is time people grew more responsible and looked at what they are doing to themselves, as a whole.  What are you showing a child when you bear and raise it in poverty, squalour?  You are teaching it disease and suffering.  Death.  Why would anyone choose to do that?  As a parent, do not tell me that there is surplus energy to love and nurture your children when you are struggling to stay alive.

Breeding violence is not productive.  What is the point of generation after generation learning that hurting other people is how you send a message or get what you want?  That is not the way.  Violence is second nature to some people.  It is their first reaction to any confrontation.  In fact, violent people will seek confrontation so that they can inflict damage.  Theirs’ is a bizarre mindset.  It wants controlling.  Realise that violence changes a person.  It hardens your heart.  If you commit acts of violence, you are not in control.  You need to be in control of your wild inside.  The anger that drives violence is a voice – amidst many – that still needs to be heard, but there are other ways for that pain to say what needs saying.  The fact that so much senseless violence is played out through alcohol intoxication should alert mankind to what it becomes under the influence.  Often, where there is truth there is conflict.

In the same way that you get breeds of animals, you get breeds of people.  Of men.  Women.  Animals accept their classification without taking it personally.  Humans don’t.  They fight themselves, each other, over what and who they are.  They are precious about their identity.  This is a consistency, everywhere.  It causes wars.  You are bred into tradition – the system – or you are bred to question the system.  Some people are bred into wealth.  What they do with that privilege is always measured.  You are bred into security, or you are not.  If you are not, your questions are for your parents.  Hard workers are a breed of people.  As are the compassionate.  Arseholes, too, are a breed.  Take each at face value.

 

 

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