A lot of people have an issue with generalisations. They can be offensive, understandably, but sometimes they are necessary. When we are included in a bracket, or labelled as a whole, it forces accountability upon the everyman. Or woman. Interestingly, that makes individuals more inclined to define themselves as different from the masses in order that they distance themselves from the responsibility the masses must carry.
A point in hand is that each generalisation that is made is a reminder. A reminder that each one of us is part of a larger picture that has a history about which we can currently do nothing. It exists. Unfortunately, humans are largely predictable. They follow like lemmings their own kind, year in and year out. They insist on behaving the same way they have done for centuries. This needs changing before generalisations can be done away with.
It can be frustrating for people who do not deserve to wear the labels that are generally given to the collective. There are always those people who do not fit the mould that society has sculpted for every man, woman and child. Those ‘misfits’ who have been dragging balls and chains that do not belong shackled to their ankles. The ‘misfits’ are okay with their load – it has facilitated their unique position. They have the best of both worlds. They can blend with the generalisations into obscurity – along with the majority of the planet – or they can take accountability for their contributions to the history of our now and refine their definitions.
You have a common sense. Be daring and use it every day. I am sure people are afraid of common sense. There are so many terms and conditions applicable to almost every transaction made these days because people have to be told how to think. They do not know how to distinguish between safe, and unsafe, it would seem. There has to be a label on every label to make sure people understand the most basic things. What has happened to simple living intelligence? What are schools teaching children if it is not to think for themselves? What have parents been teaching their children, if it is not to think for themselves? Perhaps the hysterical labelling on every product is due to the billion dollar litigation business that happens globally, where the cases are often settled in favour of the customer who is suing an organisation for their ‘negligence’. Litigation is largely out of hand. You do not sue the council if you trip over a cracked pavement. You watch where you are walking. Blaming is a big part of this planet’s culture and it is not productive. It teaches people not to be accountable for themselves.
Think about it. Common sense should prevail in every situation in which you find yourself. It should be well-developed enough to get you from A to B without you tripping over your own indecision. A common sense is inherent. You must just tap into it. Instinct and common sense are very good partners, when your common sense is well-developed you can act on instinct and be pretty sure that your outcome is going to be favourable. I suppose common sense is like the jury in a judge-and-jury system. It is a round-up of thoughts, of considerations, of estimations, in order to provide the most effective course of action for you to take when faced with a dilemma of any sort. Using common sense always has favourable results. Always. Common sense comes from the experience of centuries. It is worth finding for yourself, and using.
Common sense is like the safety on a weapon. Without it on, fatalities happen. They may not, but they can. It is better to have 0% chance of fatalities. Apply your safety. Use your common sense.
I am not quite sure this planet realises how problematic it is that children are not treated right in too many parts of the world. Probably in every part of the world. I cannot understand the need people have to breed and then abuse their children. Why would you procreate when you cannot handle having a child? And motherhood – and fatherhood – is about handling your progeny, not annihilating them. That – to me – is possibly the most stupid of all human behaviours. Breeding willy-nilly without thought of consequence, just having babies because you cannot be bothered not to. It’s obscene.
Children are vulnerable and very impressionable. All of them. How many times does that have to be said before people take heed? What you show your child of life is how it will grow. The reality is startling in its simplicity. You kick your child around, or abuse it verbally and emotionally, and you are building a damaged human being. There is not much space left on this planet for damaged people. There are already way too many. It is time that the damaging was brought under control. It is ruining people, society. I am not sure what would happen if every abuser took accountability for his/her behaviour – recognised it, themselves. If they opened their eyes they would realise the fate that was awaiting them.
Having children is not ‘what you do’ in life. Times have changed. How hard can it be to understand that parenting is not an essential part of living? How hard can it be to understand that there are a great many lives that would be far less stressful without children in them? That is fact, it is not something to feel sentimental about. Children are a joy on many levels, and that is what they are supposed to be. They are not punch-bags. They are not adults. They are not to be underestimated, either.
How is it possible in 2014 that the ANC can be in such a mess? How can they be sitting with a leader who has evaded the law on charges of corruption, of rape, and now – of theft? You cannot have a president as a role model who refuses to take accountability. For himself, for anything. Jacob Zuma authorised the spending of a quarter of a billion rand on his private residence. The fact that it is a quarter of a billion rand is problem enough, nevermind the other fact that a great many of Jacob Zuma’s ‘people’ are living in tin shacks whilst he prances around in a palace. I think he thought no one was watching what business he gets up to, what plans he makes. Everyone is watching. He is in the spotlight, under scrutiny, and he cannot run and hide. He needs to learn that taking accountability for yourself is the first of many steps that a man must make if he is going to be respected, and remembered. I am sure Jacob Zuma is a man who wants to be remembered. He must be sure he is remembered for the right things.
It is not a teacher’s job to teach a child accountability. It is a parent’s job. A teacher’s job is to reinforce what the parents teach their child, a teacher works from the base foundations laid by the parents. Do not expect teachers to bring up your children when you cannot be bothered. A child must understand accountability the same way it must understand consequence. If you make a decision and you act on that decision, you are accountable for what you bring into your days. You must take accountability for your thoughts, too, I have said this before. Your thoughts are energy, they are not just there for your entertainment.
Taking accountability is standing for yourself. If you are not inclined to do this you must accept that you are letting an empowerment opportunity pass you by. If you will not even stand for your own ideas who do you think will listen to them? No one can stand for you better than you can stand for yourself – in the face of anything at all. But first, you must learn yourself well. You cannot stand for something you do not know. If you are afraid to take accountability for a mistake you have made then how can you learn from it? Do you just carry on as usual, pretending there was no mistake, and hope the problem goes away by itself? I think that is what Jacob Zuma thinks.
The very first thing you need to understand about blame is that it is a waste of your time. It is absolutely pointless. Do not weaken your standpoint in life by whining about who did what. You allow what happens to you to happen to you. Understand this. Take accountability, do not lay blame. The power in taking accountability will make itself apparent in your everyday. Be proud of who you are, what you believe and why you choose to do what you do. Taking accountability is empowering. It is not a punishment. It is standing up and saying, ‘Yes. That was me.’ That is self-awareness. Self-belief. Recognition. Have faith in your actions, your (mis)deeds, your subconscious striving for actualisation. The striving keeps us alive and faith in yourself is never wasted. You must take accountability for your thoughts, too. I would like to point out that it does help – both yourself and others – if you would add to your statement of fact, ‘… and my reasons for doing said such and such, were …’. Give reasons willingly. They help with clarity. I have learned that in most instances it is a waste of time to hide your justifications. We all have that painful desire to justify our existence. It’s there. It is a part of wanting to be understood. We would all like to feel understood, it’s a deep-seated need. How many people have you trusted with your insides? We cannot know someone or understand them until they have shown us their insides. That is how it is.
Remember that taking accountability is not taking responsibility. Responsibility is a whole different kettle of fish. It depends on your need to play the martyr – and we all have that tendency at times – as to how much responsibility you will take on that is not yours to carry. Only carry what is yours. You must understand that you are not responsible for another’s reality. You are not responsible for the illusion they are living. You are not responsible for their existence. Until you can consciously penetrate another’s thoughts you are not in any way responsible for their thinking, either. Know that. A person’s choices are their’s alone and for those choices they will pay penalties or reap rewards when the time comes. And the time is coming. Soon we will find ourselves blending with the futures we have selected for ourselves. It will be interesting to see who is happy with their lot and who is not. Should you not be happy with how your future is going to look – given that its reality is based on your projections at present – then you had better start shifting your mindset. That starts with realising who you are at this moment and being proud of the person you have become. Know that personal pride is not a waste of time. You did not get to where you are by accident. Please remember that you are always becoming. That is evolution. That is going forwards, meeting your real self (time and again) – and reaching your full potential. Reaching your full potential is what you are here to do. So do it.