Author Archives: C.J. Birch

You are sensitive by nature, or you are not.  Psychopaths are not.  They are cynical, cruel, disenchanted with existing.  Conscienceless.  They abuse because they do not care.  Perhaps they are born that way.  Perhaps they are all made.  That matters not.  What matters is that there are a lot of them on this planet.  There is not much you can do to improve a psychopath’s outlook.  They carry within them a hatred that intensifies the longer they live.  It is likely that a psychopath will do damage, young.  I think there are a great many teachers at inner-city schools that are dealing with budding psychopaths on a daily basis.  Is it their job to recognise these lost kids?  And what do you do when you recognise a juvenile psychopath – keep your distance and just hope for the best?  I think that is what many teachers and parents do.  They watch kids being abnormal and they hope for the best.  Please know that ‘normal’ does exist.  It is being able to tell right from wrong.

Sensitivity is both a blessing, and a curse.  Its blessing is that it is a portal.  The curse is its tendency to render the environment hostile.  This overworks your adrenals.  If you are sensitive to all things that go on around you, inside of you and others, you will find living in this world to be something of an ordeal.  Being acutely sensitive is usually acutely painful.  There is a way to deal with this.  You need to manage your sensitivity the way you do your emotions.  Acknowledge it.  But toughen yourself up, or accept that your heart is going to bleed every time you step outside.  This world has a harsh reality.

It is not always possible to measure a person’s level of sensitivity by watching their behaviours.  Don’t make assumptions.  People conceal their feelings and control their reactions.  It depends on who they want to show what.  This usually has something to do with the issue of trust.  Sensitivity is often hidden from view until a firm trust has been established.  Even then, there may not be full disclosure.  It depends on the nature of the relationship you are building and the extent of the damage previously done to both parties.  Sadly, sensitivity is easily damaged.  That is why you must manage it.

Know that in love is a sacred place.  It is the secret garden.  It is where miracles take place.  Every person has a key to the door.  It is not easy to find, the door.  In fact, searching for this sacred place will often take you the same way that a rainbow does.  On a chase.  It will be a long chase for many.  Should in love simply happen upon you, consider yourself particularly blessed.  In love can be sudden.  It is a quickening.  You know immediately the first moment it is real for you.  It is possible to become more in love with someone as time goes on.  There are many long-standing relationships that can attest to that.

You cannot manipulate in love, nor can you ‘cure’ it.  It tells you what is going on, not the other way around.  It runs your system when it is first visiting.  Embrace its autonomy.  Once inside you, it can lie dormant and then wake up again at any time, unannounced.  Watch for its surprises.  Should you never have been in love, you are in for a treat when it happens.  Trust that it will happen at least once in your lifetime.  If it has never happened, you need to look at why your walls are built so high.  You cannot feel in love unless you let it in.

In love is probably the most powerful force on the planet.  Love, in itself, is second.  They are not mutually exclusive.  It is perhaps not necessary to love someone and be in love with them, but you cannot be in love and not feel love, too.  That, is impossible.  The nature of what you feel is highly specific, if you take the time to dissect it.  Love is steady, strong.  Solid.   A slow-burner.  It is there, even when its existence is denied.  In love lights a fire.  It is wild, but it softens you.  It attacks your nerves and makes you feel vulnerable.  Love, in itself, is not vulnerable.  Not one bit.  It is delicate, but it is not vulnerable.  Value love in your life.  And treasure in love if you should find it, or if it should find you.  It is not in your repertoire to be ignored.